Being a daughter and not a nurse is hard

my MIL is dying of heart failure...... with me specializing in cardiac medicine I know what could help her and maybe even add years to her life...... She does have severe heart failure but it can be minimized just by her spending 2 days in the hospital and getting IV medication....... but she wont hear of it. She is 74 and very strong willed and minded. She is scared to death of Drs and hospitals. Trying to increase her medications at home make her dizzy and her blood pressure drop. I have come to a brick wall and I dont know what to do. It is killing me to see her suffer when she doesnt have to...... I just want to cry and I feel silly talking to my husband about how bad I feel about his mom dying. thanks for listening

Guess it was time 4 his nap....lol

Aaron was playing in the kitchen in a box today after lunch. All of a

sudden he was quiet..... this is what i found

Aaron's photo album

I made aaron a photo album with pics of all his family in it..... he calls everyone mama so I am hoping this will help if we tell the right name with the picture. I just gave it to him about 30 mins ago and I think he has turned the pages about 100 times... so cute

Having a stay at home day

Aaron and I were up this morning around 8 and I desided not to go to church. My weekends are always run run run. Work has been exausting the past 3 weeks with my co worker out and i needed a down day. I really am still kinda upset with my brother and knew he would be there so I chose not to go. Guess I am becoming an outsider in my own family, or at least that is how it feels. Anyway Aaron, DH and I have had a wonderful day today. We made pancakes and eggs for lunch and just hung out and played.....

a bit crushed and upset

My family has always been really close. We it seems the older we get the further I am being pushed away. My sister and I have always had to work at getting along, but my brother and I have always been great. My brother and his wife moved 1 min from my sister about 9 months ago and ever since I have been getting the cold shoulder. My brother even playing threatened me with a knife in public in front of my son...... we were at a birthday party and well it was 8 and 30 min past aarons bed time so we had to go...... aaron wanted a ballon so i went to get him one.... well my brothers kids were not done eating because they got there an hour late...... He actually pulled his knife out and opened it at me and growled. I know its silly that i am upset about this but its been the way he and my sister has been treating me lately..... and its getting really old. Like my feelings dont matter...... I am really considering not going to his bday party next week.

Aaron proves batman cant fly

Here is aaron having some fun tonight........ lol

aaron's 4 week post op visit good news

We just left UNC. Dr vanAlst did say aaron still does have a small fistula but it is healed around the edges so it shouldn't get any bigger. Aaron is compensating for it anyway. Hardly no food comes out his nose anymore and he has started to suck. So we have made great progress in 4 weeks!! Also aaron is using his palate to form words so it is working. I am on happy mommy.

aaron is learning so much

Well aaron learned to suck over the weekend........ I noticed he was making sucking sounds on his sippy cup!!!! I know this may seem small to some of you but its huge with all that has been going on in his mouth..... he is still talking up a storm..... learning new words every day.... he pointed up today and just said "sky" its amazing!!!

Fall Fest today.... fun with pics

yummy pumpkin.... check out my tatto

He had a ball!!!

Going to a Fall Fest

The local rescue squad I belong to is having a fall fest today. They are going to have all kinds of games and stuff. I am so excited to see him have fun.. I will post pics and update when we get back